Laughing at death and being motivated to clean toilets...

A few moments to sit and blog.
So rare.
Today is stunning: warm and bright.
Connections at church and doctored up soup and -- even cleaning the toilet was enjoyable.
Thank God for the spring air to motivate the cleaner in me.
The cleaner in me usually hides and lets anyone else willing or near do the work, so this is truly remarkable.

I'm so grateful to be in rehearsals on a play.  "$38,000 For a Friendly Face".  It's been wonderful to explore through the eyes of my character Esther who is the head of the Last Supper Committee - a group of women who make lunches for funerals.

I gave myself the mantra "I can do no wrong" - as a way to keep obeying my instincts and not waste time second guessing.  It's been helpful.  And I've had fun.  I get to act opposite some great people and see them more fully.

The play is full of fight and insecurity - both.

I like that it gets messy before it opens into genuine truth, vulnerability and love.  So like life.

I find it interesting that I become a more generous person when I get to be smack in the middle of something I love to do.

Suddenly I have eyes to see...

My heart is full and hungry for life to be just as meaningful moment to moment as it is in a play where everything is heightened.

A conversation where Dave tells a sad story and the Grey Havens theme from Lord of the Rings comes on to underscore and brings such sweet welling of grateful tears...

The ice puddle in our back yard now a little lake with the swing of warm air this afternoon.

Faithful Lester waiting for a little love.

Donovan singing the Gondor theme and creating a new language and alphabet, inspired by JRR Tolkien.

Weston sliding with glee on his new "carpet skates" he got from the church swap - which was really just and excuse to linger and visit.


To connect with my pastor who is worn out with hurting from three funerals last week.

What is it with funerals?

Our play is a comedy set in a funeral home.  We laugh in the midst of death.  Sometimes I wonder if folks may find our play disrespectful of funerals or somehow making fun of death- but then I remember: no.  Funerals are strange.  They are unusual.  And they can be well, kind of funny. They can be downright obnoxious.  They can be a stressful time where truth is told and conflict ensues and only through a humbling letting down of the guard can there be any true release or... resolve, or dare I say...

Redemption.

That's the payoff.
That's what we pine for.
That's what has to be true for this life to be lived with purpose.
That's why death is not only a great leveler, but a great motivator

To live.

And now, to go clean the boys' toilet....