New perspectives...

The snow is really melting now and Weston loves the clear roads for scootering.
He and Donovan made their longest train bridge yet, and there's even a couple pics here of Donovan's famous hiding place for hide and seek: in the laundry basket! He really startled Weston and he loved that!

There are some strange things happening.
I have been very sad a number of times over the last 4 weeks.
I've been dealing with some personal struggles and issues and still sad about my friend Helen dying. The picture of Weston in his tie and jacket was from the day of Helen's funeral. Dave sang Panis Angelicus as requested by Helen and I spent most of the service trying not to howl. I wanted to cry and let out all my sorrow, but I didn't want to distract from the lovely service.
Seeing dear Helen's body did not help. They styled her hair in a way I'd never seen and of course she looked so made-up, but no breath in the lungs... all I could think was: "that's not her; she's already home."
Then, what started as a tension headache during the service quickly progressed to a full blown seething migraine and I nearly had to run throw up. Sadly, I'd not eaten that day, which never happens, but I was so distraught: I had to go lie down in the nursery and miss out on the luncheon and meeting with friends. Sigh.
The next Monday there was a women's retreat at church on "rest". I had so much to do, that every time it was mentioned in church I usually thought: I should just get stuff done on that day, then I'd feel better. But in the end, David and Weston agreed to let me attend a retreat focused on rest. So, I showed up with my body pillow and blanky and spent time alone, once again in the church nursery. I spent a bit of time journaling and studying the verse I'd been given. then I got sleepy and found lying down on the hard floor not so comfortable. That's when I eyed the crib. --When we moved to Rosebud in 2006, there was really no room for the crib in our new home, and no longer any need for it, so we asked if the church could use it.-- So, the crib that Donovan and Weston grew up in sits in the nursery of Rosebud Church, complete with all the bedding (sunshine and stars motif) and even Gigi's little ducky blanket. So... yes, carefully testing the bottom with one foot --I stepped in: it held me! Then I drug in my body pillow and blanky and snuggled in. I fit perfect! OK, so I was in the fetal position, but still it was comfy. I was so heavy and just let my breath fall in deep and let the thoughts pour in. What a fascinating perspective: to look out from a crib with it's jail-like bars, but also a place of safety and softness, but this time as an adult. ... Then I slept. A little bit. Then I got out and did some interesting Bible study in Zechariah, then I snacked and journaled, and then joined my friends for a lunch that none of us had to work to make or clean up. Chef Nathan made it and it was special, unique and tasty!
After that nice meal I knew where I was headed on this day of rest... --back to my crib for a nap! Yes, that's what I did, with only the slightest measure of sheepishness knowing that some of my other women friends were diligently working through the workbook. Ahhh. It was nice. I took two short naps and then the ideas started coming for my original play I want to produce in July. The ideas kept pouring in and it was all I could do to run to my other notebook in the sanctuary to write them down. Then Barb helped me find a concordance and even two encyclopedias and I went to work. It reminded me of my birthday research trip last February in Cambridge, MA. What a treat to have even two hours of uninterrupted quiet to do work! I loved it. And I got my rest too! I was grateful. In the end, I found rest and accomplishment.
Ahhh.
So, in a time of strange sorrow and fatigue and homebody Olympic watching... things are getting stirred and pondered for possible growth later on.
Oh yes.... and something else!
I developed a terrible eye infection after my day of rest that made it impossible to open my eye and had to be driven to the hospital early in the morning while David taught. (Thanks to LaVerne and Arlene!) Well, my eye did not clear up fast enough, so I went back in yesterday only to learn that I had been misdiagnosed at the hospital and was given a new prescription. After a lot of run around at different pharmacies and some trouble with insurance, I finally had the correct medication and hurried back to the eye doctor for my new glasses. I don't like glasses, but now I own some so my eyes can be contact-free for a whole week. I wore them in dance class last night and I hated it. I like getting to see sharply, but I hate having something on my face. They really feel limiting and strange. I hope I get over that... and then back into my contacts soon!
Anyway, that's why I'm showing them off for the computer camera. I took five minutes to choose the frames and forked over money for the lenses. Poor David was not too excited about how much money I can manage to spend in one afternoon during a time we're supposed to be saving for our house project. Ugh. Well.... par for the coarse of my strange last month.
But perhaps... a new perspective.